Crush and crushes

Omg... I wish I don't have a crush or something... I have this habit of having crush every year. And I don't like it.

It started when I was just primary school. I'll have different crush in different years. But if I'm with the same classmates for the different year, then most probably my crush will be same.

During secondary school, I joined societies, clubs, house practice. So I know or see more people.. so mostly I'll have crushes from there, but it wasn't as bad as primary school. To be honest, I only liked 3 guys. form 2 till 3 one guy (house practice), form 4 one guy (saw him in a mall and he caught my eye, then didn't expect him that he was in the same uniform unit) and form 5 one (classmate)

Now!! College is gotten worst!! My 1st sem coursemate, there's one guy I'm interested, but later found out that he was taken, so I manage to not think of him. Then my moral studies, we had join  with few groups of seniors. And this one guy look super cute, but deep down, he was out of my league. So forgot it...

Then here comes 2nd sem, I don't know why I keep noticing him, like little things. I had two classes with him. One class I purposely sit behind him, and another he sit next to me (this time I didn't purposely sit next to him, he asked himself to sit there o_O)

then weeks later, I overheard his conversation with one of my coursemate about fetch him to his place... Wait... it sounds confusing... okay... let's say the guy I'm interested now is Nathan and my coursemate is Adam. So Adam asked Nathan jokingly to fetch Adam to Nathan's place. Then Nathan reply, can't, cause need to pick up girlfriend. I hope I listened wrong, but part of me also hope it was true, so I could stop be interested in him.

Haiz.. but it's hard when he sit next to me. Even recently that I said some mistake, then he lightly hit me on the head with a paper. Then yesterday, while walking back to my car after class, I was humming a random song, minding I own business, taking my own sweet time. Then suddenly from behind he wack my bag me with his file and talk to me for a few sentence then he walk off like a he was in hurry...

At that moment, I was so confuse! I'm that kind of person easily influence. Maybe the actions were just to be a friendly classmate, my mind playing tricks in my brain said that he might giving hints... WTH??

Why my head is so complicated??